Diary of a Traumatised Cat Owner

Day 1

The BF has finally succumbed to persuasion to get a cat. (Actually succumbed some time before Christmas but it has taken us until now to get organised). Browse various websites. Finally decided to consider cat rescue. (Friends' previous bad experiences with psychotic cats put me off - BF already thinks cats are out to take over the planet). Two beautiful kittens are available from Bolton Cat Rescue. Actually, there's a lot of lovely cats and kittens available from Bolton Cat Rescue but I like the look of these two. One is black and white and the other is black.

Day 2

Ring Bolton. Questionnaire to complete and we'll be vetted on Sunday. That was fast!

Day 4

Have been vetted and we have passed. Apparently, we're getting the female and whichever one of her four brothers she decides to bring with her. I like the sound of this girl. Off to Pets at Home.

Later:

Am traumatised. Since when has cat ownership been this difficult? How many collars does a cat need? What's with all the choice on food bowls and mats? Why would I want all the cats' stuff to be heart shaped, covered in flowers and pink? As for the food - scientific, hypoallergenic, anti hairball, sensitive skin, anti dandruff... I'm making the last one up, I think? And then there's all of the decisions to be made about what the cat will crap in - non-clumping, clumping, environmentally friendly, wooden, semi wooden, blue, grey, sky-blue-pink-with-yellow-dots?

Previous cat Lollipop did alright without this lot and she was 22 when she had to be put down.

Day 6

Got the cats! Bandit has been charging all over the house and she most definitely owns the house now. This is Smokey. He hasn't come out from behind the sofa all night. He howls when he can't see his sister. She runs back to him with what looks like cat exasperation.



Day 7

Smokey has moved from behind the sofa. He's now under it. This is not going well. BF is working from home this afternoon to "help them settle in". Text message updates about eating and crapping. Everyone at work is laughing at me but then they're all asking when the next update is due.

I don't want a traumatised cat. Apart from the fact I don't want the cats to be upset there's the very happy situation that they're litter trained at the minute. Traumatised cats crap everywhere.

Later

Smokey has taken up residence under the dining table. It's an improvement.


(Blurry photo (obviously) with his sister)

BF empties the litter tray. Running commentary regarding the difference between cat wee and cat poo in the litter tray. "That's what happens when a man does household chores".

Can't believe how soppy the BF is.